Do as Paris Hilton does and "Luv Thyself"

For Valentine ’s Day two years ago, I celebrated an ultimate girls night and went out for Indian food. My friends and I were in good company as 90% of the restaurant was filled with table after table of young women. Apparently nothing screams "single" quite like the New Delhi All U Can Eat Buffet.

“The intern got two dozen roses sent to her today,” I told my friends over dinner. “And then, my boss asked me where my bouquet was. I told him, ‘At this point, I’d settle for someone sending me an e-mail.’”

After successfully eating my way into a stomach ache that night, I decided that I would buy myself flowers the following year. Of course, I never followed through on that in 2007 because flowers are expensive and I’d rather treat myself to a mocha. Plus, not to state the obvious or anything, but buying yourself flowers to avenge a former boss is, quite frankly, kind of pathetic.

Unfortunately, not everyone came to that conclusion as celebrity divorce attorney and author, Stacy D. Phillips, recently released a list of “many wonderful things you can do for yourself to feel loved and special during this once yearly 'hallmark' occasion."

My favorite?

“Hit the tattoo parlor: Large or small, get one that says "I love you." It's a lifetime reminder of what you mean to you.”

I like tattoos as much as the next guy, but I really don’t need a lifetime reminder of what I mean to me – whatever that even means. "Large or small," it all sounds like a pretty big mistake.

I think I’ll just revisit the buffet. And maybe get a mocha for dessert.