Does this pant suit come with a cape?

I used to have a boss who would call me demanding to know the status of things that I had no idea even existed. I learned to take all of her calls while standing up so that I could reach every single item in my cubicle – including my coat – within three seconds.

When that strategy didn’t work, I’d answer, “I don’t know, but I could find out for you.”

Invariably, this would infuriate her.

She’d demand to know, “Well could you find out?!”

And by the time I would find out – usually several minutes later – her needs would have changed and she would chastise me for calling her directly. And just for fun, she would usually refer to me by the wrong name – Nora.

I used to joke, “My God, when she calls, I feel like I’m answering the Bat Phone.”

Of course, that was just a joke. I never expected RedHotPhones.com to make a phone just to satisfy my needs. And I definitely didn’t expect AbleComm, Inc. to put out a press release with the title, “Now Everyone Can Have a Flashing Red Phone Like Batman.”

“At Wayne Manor, the flashing red Batphone is answered by Alfred the butler, who tells Wayne about the trouble. Then Wayne and his young ward Dick Grayson put on their superhero costumes. As Batman and Robin, they race from the Batcave in the Batmobile to battle evil-doers, or rescue citizens in distress,” reads the release.

So we got the phone - that should help with my battles with corporate evil-doers. Now all I need is the superhero costume.

I mean, that’s all Nora needs.